depression Archives - A Step at a Time

Supporting Parent/Adult Mental Health

Posted by | anxiety, depression, low mood, mental health, relationships, self-esteem, Stress | No Comments

Whilst I frequently write about child mental health, this blog is a shallow dive into adult mental health, to support parents, carers and wider family members who may need some support. Mental health, whilst a subject more frequently written and talked about, is still shrouded in its own elements of taboo and stigma. The reality, all of us have mental health. In its simplest form, mental health is a pendulum, swinging back and forth throughout our lives between good mental health and ill mental health.  Different life circumstances, situations and experiences may influence the pendulum in the short, medium or longer term. So, what dictates our responses to this? For the majority, core factors that affect our reactions and the impact and duration of the impact on our mental health include (but not exhaustive): Previous life experiences Our state of mental health at the time of the event Our resilience…

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How to recognise signs of poor mental health in children and 5 ways to support children at home.

Posted by | anxiety, Children's Therapy, confidence, depression, emotional eating, grief, low mood, parent separation, self-belief, self-esteem, separation anxiety, Stress, Teenagers, well-being | No Comments

The thing about mental health, is that we all have it. If we imagine it as a swinging pendulum, throughout out life times, our mental health moves between good mental well-being and poor mental well-being, depending on life circumstances, events and situations. Everyone can have days when their mental health feels more sensitive, but for some, realising that their mental health is suffering and needs support can be a shock. For children and teenagers, brain development is ever changing and moving, children’s pre-frontal cortex – the part of the brain that supports rational thought, seeing perspectives, solving problems and regulation continues its development throughout childhood and adolescence. So, we cannot expect our children to know how to manage their own feelings without guidance and support. In addition, as their primary responses come from their limbic brain system we can often see strong emotions, reactive and instinctive responses to issues –…

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Teens, mental health timelines and cabin fever (How to cope)

Posted by | anxiety, boredom, child therapy, confidence, depression, low mood, self-belief, Stress, Teenagers, trauma | No Comments

Over the last week, I have spoken to more teens and parents who are experiencing the impact of the emotions rollercoaster created by cabin fever. This can include feelings of: Increased anxiety Decreased mood Heightened frustration Increased feelings of being trapped Increased feelings of anger, annoyance and irritability The realities of cabin fever, are that many of us are feeling exhausted, trapped and annoyed right now, and the quicker we put in place constructive systems to help us manage the feelings and build our resilience that better the outcomes for our mental health. Some early signs that we need to be aware of, that may indicate your teen (or you) is beginning to struggle are: Sleeping more – or using sleep to avoid things Motivation has dropped Avoidance of activities, interactions or learning Increased screen time Use of electronics to avoid, distract or escape Increased or decreased eating habits Less…

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Managing children’s disappointment when they have to stay home

Posted by | boredom, Children's Therapy, confidence, depression | No Comments

With the sudden changes to children’s routines there is, understandably, a great deal of disappointment, frustration and anxiety being caused to a great number of children. Younger children struggle with not having planned and considered goodbyes to manage transitions, older children are missing out on planned trips and events, whilst those with GCSEs and A-Levels are frustrated and confused by the sudden changes to their exams. Those students who had worked tirelessly feel short-changed that they did not get an opportunity to show their work, those who took longer to warm up and were just hitting their stride to work are scared that they will be assessed on the work that is not a true picture of their capabilities. Regardless of which boat they sit in, the changes and tsunami of emotions that they are experiencing, and will experience over coming weeks is understandable. Without life experience, the resilience to…

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5 things to do to keep your mental health more stable whilst staying home

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, books, boredom, child therapy, confidence, depression, low mood, self-belief, self-esteem | No Comments

As the world faces a new challenge, and we are in a position of needing to stay home to protect others, ensuring that we take steps to protect the mental health of our family, and ourselves, becomes vital. Having spoken to many people over recent days, here are 5 things that you can action right now to support you and your family. Plan a routine – Whilst we have energy and focus, making a plan for the next 6-8 weeks can help give you structure and focus. For those with home learning to do with children, this will give structure to some of the day, for those working from home, this will cover some of the weekdays, but for all of us we need to consider the time around this. Consider activities you have been procrastinating about at home, jobs you want to complete, home learning you could do as…

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When ‘just getting on with it’ breaks you….

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

“I just need to get on with it”  “I’ve got to get on”  “I’ve got to get back to it”  “I used to, I need to get on with it”  How many times have you used those words? Or watched and listened to a good friend or work colleague use them? If you’re anything like me its a lot! In a fast paced world where we have so much to do, our to do lists are never completed are you a victim of the ‘just getting on with it’ clique? So why is it a problem?  Here’s the problem….. The ‘just getting on with it’ clique are used to being invincible. They get ludicrous amounts of work done in a day, move mountains, are off saving the world. juggling a lot of balls and never seem to do them…. or do they? What happens when the ‘getting it done’ person…

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Why BWRT gave me permission to be happy…..

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, depression | No Comments

In September I experienced the BWRT 4 week programme. It was a lengthy decision to undergo the process, I had already used BWRT for some public speaking nerves and so I was already convinced of its effectiveness…. So you understand why I wanted do it, I’ll give you some background… So here’s the thing, I am a really motivated person, I will work when most people give up, I plough on even if it seems impossible and I have literally made the impossible happen over the years. Then this year I took on the biggest challenge of my career, I wrote a book… The thing is, the book series had been planned for years and when a friend asked me for some help with their little one who was struggling I knew I had to step up and do something, so I wrote what would turn out to be a…

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This New Year….. Quit ‘Trying’

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, diets, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

New Year – New You…. and all the resolutions begin… The problem with resolutions is that so few people ever achieve them, not for a lack of wanting to, and not because they don’t matter to them, it’s just that the very nature of resolutions is that we already know when we write them that it is unlikely we will commit to them for 12 months – but we will ‘try’. And there lies the problem… The very word ‘try‘ So what is the issue with the word? let me explain… The very nature of the word ‘TRY’ is that is it ‘ok to fail’. When we are very little our parents, teachers, aunts, uncles, family friends will all encourage us to ‘try’ and then, when they are tired of watching us struggle, or we cannot quite do it, they…..do it for us… From that moment on we learn that…

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Glance Back, Move Forward

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, diets, hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy gastric band, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

There’s something about Christmas that almost forces us to reflect, perhaps because Christmas seems to come round faster and faster every year, perhaps because it’s one of the few static moments in our diary that we can be certain of happening and non-negotiable, you can hardly avoid the twinkling lights, wrapping paper and bustling shoppers, or the catalogue of Christmas adverts filling our television screens, can you? Christmas is therefore a pivotal point in which we can look back at what has changed over the last 365 days… Perhaps it is the…. The difficulties we have faced The changes in job, home, routine The changes in our children or loved ones The friends that we made, loved, or lost The changes in our health The happy moments, the sad moments, the memories Christmas for me is always a great time of reflection, often starting with the changes that were out…

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I have a problem – is BWRT 2 for me?

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

BWRT – Is it for me?  I was really lucky that a few weekends ago I was on the Level 2 BrainWorking Recursive Therapy course training to become an Advanced Practitioner. Having used BWRT 1 for months now I have loved the results and the versatility of the treatment. I’ll give you some examples of things that we’ve treated with it so far: Sugar Cravings Cookie addictions Portion control Boredom eating Social drinking (when get in from work) Social drinking to excess Driving confidence Being courteous to people you find frustrating Healing from relationships Overcoming trauma Overcoming the trauma of a car accident Anger triggers Anger management Anxiety triggers Anxiety from new experiences or large social events Quit Smoking Letting go of upset caused by family members Interview nerves Motorway driving So having seen these results I was keen to find out what BWRT 2 would offer.   So what’s…

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Is the past holding you back?

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, depression, diets, hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy gastric band, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

I was talking to a client this week who admitted to me that she didn’t really believe that she could lose weight… Which is funny because she was paying me to support her in changing her mindset about food through hypnotherapy and BWRT (BrainWorking Recursive Therapy) Which got us to talking about where these beliefs come from and why we feel destined to never achieve our goals. Try these on for size: – Did you ever lose weight and then friends or family changed their behaviour towards you? – Did you ever lose weight and get criticism for being ‘too slim’ ‘skinny’ – Did you ever lose weight and it affected your relationship? – Did you ever lose weight and it impacted your employment? – Did you ever lose weight and take it too far and now worry about that happening again? – the list goes on…. Our brain (specifically…

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Are toxic relationships affecting your health?

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, depression, hypnotherapy, weight loss, well-being | No Comments

Do you have a relationship in your life that forever leaves you feeling: – Isolated? – Excluded? – Fighting for attention? – Doubting yourself? – Questioning why something just happened? – Wondering why you are invisible half the time? – Feeling inadequate? – Making you question your own existence? The list goes on? Something that I notice more and more personally and professionally as the years go on is that many relationships (sexual and friendships as well as family) transform over the years and that not all of them remain constructive to our physical and emotional well-being. Quite often we can find ourselves in relationships where the balance is consistently off and we are repeatedly walking away feeling unsatisfied, if not angry and upset about the behaviour that we have experienced and the impact that this has had on us. The scary thing is, that this shift often happens overnight…

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BWRT – Can a phobia, habit or trauma really be gone in a session?

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, depression, hypnotherapy | No Comments

You might have seen the term BWRT appearing on the website and Facebook page for A Step at a Time and be thinking – what is it? From August 2016 I am pleased to be able to say that it is being offered at A Step at a Time in order to offer a new dimension to treatments and further influence the success for clients wishing to rid themselves of previous problems. One of the reasons I was so keen to offer it was based on the occasional client who gets results from their treatments but ‘fights’ the process or ‘flips back’ to old habits at the first mention of stress. These clients want results but struggle to gauge the concept of ‘lifestyle’ and once they have taken one day off it starts a succession of them. A frustration for them and a disappointment for me when I know how…

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Why do we feel bad for saying we feel low?

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, depression, hypnotherapy, low mood, Responsive Therapy, Stress | No Comments

Depression, low mood, negative thoughts and loneliness…. Why do we struggle so much with talking about them? In a society where communication methods is rife it seems counterproductive that our mental health statistics are of the highest we have ever seen? So what is contributing? And why do we find it so hard to support? 1. We assume – because someone posts something positive on their social media accounts we assume they are happy. The issue being that often those struggling will not say anything, how many suicide cases do you hear where people say ‘but they didn’t say ahything’. Unfortunately our powers of assumption can mean that seeing positive status’ mean we think all is well so can be less likely to pick up the phone and say ‘are you ok’ 2. We close down – many people struggle to know what to say when someone is in a…

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Is social media making you anxious?

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, depression, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

Social media, you can’t get away from it can you? Everywhere you go someone is tweeting, posting, snap chatting or linking to some kind of social media platform, so what’s the problem? and why can they exasperate feelings of anxiety? Social media was created as a means to connect with one another, in the most part that’s exactly what it has done, hasn’t it? You can now see the whereabouts, updates and live feeds of you friends, old work colleagues and past acquaintances. We can network, apply for jobs, meet new people and purchase incredible items from the luxury of our sofas or beds. Its increased ournetworks and contacts tenfold but what happens when it goes wrong? 1. We start comparisons When we see the old school friend who has recently gotten married when we just split with our partner, or we cannot fall pregnant but your old work colleague…

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