Children's Therapy Archives - A Step at a Time

Is the world causing our children anxiety?

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

As the years go by my office is filled with more and more children and teenagers who are struggling with unwanted thoughts and feelings. Since I wrote the Adventures of Brian book collection this has only grown more considerably. Leading me to question – is the world causing our children anxiety? 19 years ago when I first entered the world of early years (working in a nursery) we would occasionally meet a child with separation anxiety or thumb sucking but these were few and far between. 15 years ago when I first went to work as a lecturer with 16-19 year olds you may have one teenager in your class with depression or anxiety but again it was much more a rarity than the world presented today. In the early days of my career, or even in my own school days you just didn’t find a huge number of children…

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A-B-C – are we missing the letters of child behaviour?

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, BWRT, Children's Therapy, hypnotherapy | No Comments

When I started my career working as a nursery nurse and later as a Nursery Manager and then a lecturer of early years I would routinely teach the ABC of behaviour to my staff and students… it was as simple as falling off a bike and a lesson I continue to use in my work as a therapist, however it is a lesson that we are forgetting in LIFE. Let me explain…. A B C of behaviour  The ABC of behaviour looks at child behaviour from the position that everything has an ABC A – Antecedent (the thing that caused the behaviour) B – Behaviour (the behaviour being demonstrated) C – Consequence (the result of the behaviour) It is an insightful way of remembering that NOTHING appears without a cause, so all behaviours from children are created by an ‘A’… Skipping the key letters…. However as the years go by,…

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2 reasons our children’s worries are greater than ever

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy | No Comments

Have you ever noticed that our children are worrying more than ever? Children’s worries are at an all time high. Every week in my office I am visited by children and teenagers who are struggling with worries, anxiety or catastrophizing about events that haven’t even happened. The incidences of appointments for these has risen significantly over the last year. This includes visits for: – Children worrying about safety – Child anxiety – Separation anxiety from parents – Children struggling with OCD or habit based behaviours – Sleep issues – Children who catastrophize about events that ‘might’ happen in the future So where has it come from? Before I start my explanations (from my personal perspective) I want you to cast your mind back to the late 1980s/early 1990s – the days when as children we were found climbing in trees, staying out on your bike, water fights with your super…

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3 reasons NOT to wait for your child to grow out of it…

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy, confidence | No Comments

Why you shouldn’t wait for your child to access children’s therapy for their worries and behaviours….. “They’ll grow out of it”  “Don’t worry about it – they’ll grow out of it”  “We’ll review it when they are older….”  Ever heard those ill fated words before? When it comes to our child’s emotional or mental health do we really want to WAIT? In some cases they will grow out of it, for example a few children do grow out of their little worries, some children do grow out of their anxiety, and many  children do grow out of their toilet training issues (did you know that the hormones responsible for urine control in some children don’t mature until the age of 12??) HOWEVER Many issues do not disappear and in some cases leaving your child to grow out of it can actually create a greater issue to be treated later.  So…

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I’m not a statistic – I’m me…..

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, Children's Therapy, confidence, Eating Disorders, grief, Responsive Therapy, trauma, weight loss | No Comments

One of the greatest things that I find when working in disordered eating, anxiety or even trauma and bereavement is that so many of my clients have been treated as a statistic. Whether they are frustrated at being prescribed medication for symptoms not the cause, placed on long waiting lists for therapeutic talk therapies or provided with food plans which feel overwhelming the one thing that they all have in common is that they feel like a number, a statistic, a non-existent person. I remember years ago visiting the GP, my disordered eating spiralling, obsessed with exercise and collar bones and hip bones that were (in retrospect) very unattractive and a sign of the lack of health and nutrition I was experiencing) to be thrust a depression questionnaire to assess whether I was a risk to myself….. In that moment I felt like there wasn’t much hope left. The doctor…

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What if we could draw perfectly?

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, anxiety, books, BWRT, Children's Therapy, confidence, Responsive Therapy, self-esteem | No Comments

My friend’s little girl came to play yesterday. We had finished baking and were sat at my dining room table drawing together (and using every single sticker I had in the house) when she looked over at my picture. I was drawing a picture of Brian (from the Adventures of Brian) at the time and she stopped and said ‘how did you get so good at drawing?’ When I replied ‘well I practiced lots and made lots of mistakes to learn’ she laughed and said ‘but I make lots of mistakes’ which made me stop for a moment. We all make lots of mistakes, don’t we? I probably spend most of my day getting frustrated at my own mistakes and having to find ways to resolve them. But only a child will tell you that honestly, with no agenda, no cover up, just pure honesty – ‘I make lots of…

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Why we need to teach our children not to give up….

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

When I used to teach my students often got fed up with me, I will add here that it wasn’t because I was a terrible teacher, but because I refused to listen to the words ‘can’t’ I can’t do it The words I wouldn’t abide by. I wasn’t being mean… The thing is, I said it because I knew that they COULD do it – I just needed to show them a different way. That was my job as far as I was concerned. If they weren’t getting it then I needed to explain it or demonstrate it in a different way so that they COULD get it and they COULD do their work and that they COULD achieve. After all, those achievements add up, and when we learn to persevere we learn do find new ways to do things. New routes to our goals, and new journeys to our…

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When ‘just getting on with it’ breaks you….

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

“I just need to get on with it”  “I’ve got to get on”  “I’ve got to get back to it”  “I used to, I need to get on with it”  How many times have you used those words? Or watched and listened to a good friend or work colleague use them? If you’re anything like me its a lot! In a fast paced world where we have so much to do, our to do lists are never completed are you a victim of the ‘just getting on with it’ clique? So why is it a problem?  Here’s the problem….. The ‘just getting on with it’ clique are used to being invincible. They get ludicrous amounts of work done in a day, move mountains, are off saving the world. juggling a lot of balls and never seem to do them…. or do they? What happens when the ‘getting it done’ person…

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This New Year….. Quit ‘Trying’

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, diets, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

New Year – New You…. and all the resolutions begin… The problem with resolutions is that so few people ever achieve them, not for a lack of wanting to, and not because they don’t matter to them, it’s just that the very nature of resolutions is that we already know when we write them that it is unlikely we will commit to them for 12 months – but we will ‘try’. And there lies the problem… The very word ‘try‘ So what is the issue with the word? let me explain… The very nature of the word ‘TRY’ is that is it ‘ok to fail’. When we are very little our parents, teachers, aunts, uncles, family friends will all encourage us to ‘try’ and then, when they are tired of watching us struggle, or we cannot quite do it, they… it for us… From that moment on we learn that…

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Glance Back, Move Forward

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, diets, hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy gastric band, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

There’s something about Christmas that almost forces us to reflect, perhaps because Christmas seems to come round faster and faster every year, perhaps because it’s one of the few static moments in our diary that we can be certain of happening and non-negotiable, you can hardly avoid the twinkling lights, wrapping paper and bustling shoppers, or the catalogue of Christmas adverts filling our television screens, can you? Christmas is therefore a pivotal point in which we can look back at what has changed over the last 365 days… Perhaps it is the…. The difficulties we have faced The changes in job, home, routine The changes in our children or loved ones The friends that we made, loved, or lost The changes in our health The happy moments, the sad moments, the memories Christmas for me is always a great time of reflection, often starting with the changes that were out…

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The Power of Children and why we need to listen to them…

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, books, Children's Therapy, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

‘It’s just a child’ ‘You’re too little’ ‘When you’re older’ I’ve spent over 15 years of my career working with children in a variety of capacities from early years professions, to teaching, to child obesity and now therapy, and there is a resounding pattern that I’ve watched repeat itself…. We don’t listen to them… when really they are more highly intuitive than we will ever be.. Let me explain… Children have this incredible capacity to identify what is really happening and they gauge feelings, situations and issues in a completely different way to adults. As an adult we will try to weigh up options, look at pros and cons, utilise our pattern matches to see if we have any prior experience which tells us what we should ‘do next’. We then use this information along with our perception of our ‘gut instincts’ and apply to said situation and hope for…

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I have a problem – is BWRT 2 for me?

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

BWRT – Is it for me?  I was really lucky that a few weekends ago I was on the Level 2 BrainWorking Recursive Therapy course training to become an Advanced Practitioner. Having used BWRT 1 for months now I have loved the results and the versatility of the treatment. I’ll give you some examples of things that we’ve treated with it so far: Sugar Cravings Cookie addictions Portion control Boredom eating Social drinking (when get in from work) Social drinking to excess Driving confidence Being courteous to people you find frustrating Healing from relationships Overcoming trauma Overcoming the trauma of a car accident Anger triggers Anger management Anxiety triggers Anxiety from new experiences or large social events Quit Smoking Letting go of upset caused by family members Interview nerves Motorway driving So having seen these results I was keen to find out what BWRT 2 would offer.   So what’s…

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Why we should always follow our dreams …..

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, books, BWRT, Children's Therapy, diets, hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy gastric band, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

When I was little I wanted to…. When I was young I wanted to… Before I was married I was going to…. Before I had children I was going to…. Before I retire I would like to…. How many times have you delayed your dreams? The things with dreams, is that we are almost encouraged to have them, aren’t we? When we are little we draw pictures of ourselves as princess, princes, knights, queens, pirates, astronauts, dancers….. you name it, you can draw it, and take on the dream, that one day, ONE DAY, you will do that thing… Then when we get to school we dream of careers and what we want to do with our lives, and we make a choice at that moment whether to tell people, well, realistically we have to, the education system effectively makes us tell them. When I worked in education as a…

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5 factors that slow down results after a Hypnotherapy Gastric Band

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy, hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy gastric band, Responsive Therapy, Stress, Testimonials, Uncategorised, Weight Loss | No Comments

Many clients come to see me as they know someone who has had great results from a virtual gastric band. The successes are great, but what factors can affect success from being at the speed desired? 1.Overthinking – Overthinking is the biggest stumbling block for this treatment. As Kerri (Face of ASAT) says ’embrace it and you will fly’ those clients who are the most successful fastest simply EMBRACE the treatment as their lifestyle, follow it daily with no excuses and do not question what they are doing. Wondering constant whether it is working or not, whether you are doing it right, whether you should be doing XYZ are all delaying you results and preventing you from reaching your goal as instead of listening to your body and your new mindset you are searching for an old mindset that we just spent 3 hours getting rid of. BEST TIP –…

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