hypnotherapy Archives - A Step at a Time

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2 reasons why your friend is making you feel uncomfortable and how to deal with it!

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, Uncategorised | No Comments

Ever had those days when your friend/partner is making you feel uncomfortable? But not because you hate them…just something is – well off? And I don’t mean in the stagnant water way! The thing is, at times we will find that friends or partners (or even family members) really get under our skin. Our first retaliation is to blame them for it… But what if it’s YOU? Eek…. yep I said it… it’s highly likely it’s you! Before you contemplate killing me for that statement let me explain where I am going with this… Sometimes our friends just drive us insane…. we can love them from the bottom of our hearts, and adore them completely, we would walk over hot coals for them – but still the very second they text/call/email/Facebook/turn up you feel uncomfortable, irritable or just like there is a glitch in the system. Here’s two reasons why…….

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Is your past haunting you? The real reason you are going round in circles!

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

Do you ever feel like your past is haunting you? Like you keep coming back to the same problem? Or you have really, really bad luck? Perhaps you feel like the universe is punishing you? Or that you can’t get anything right? Or MAYBE your mind is stuck in a detrimental thought loop that you simply cannot break? Ooh now that’s a thought isn’t it? If you have ever heard that old adage, you can’t change the problem, only your attitude to the problem then you might see where I am going with this. If not then Hi! Welcome to my thought process today! So now we have established a small chance that your past is NOT haunting you, (and rather your thought processes are) I’ll explain where I am going with this…. Our brains and patterns… Every week in my office I meet at least one client who tells…

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Are your friendships damaging your mental health?

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, Uncategorised | No Comments

Are your friendships damaging your mental health? Limiters, enablers or encouragers…… what on earth am I on about? With social media taking over all communication, texts a preference and knowing (or even having) a home phone quickly becoming a thing of the past the one thing that it does allow is for us to watch personality types and friendship types become visual. We can also begin to understand how mental health has decreased as social media increases. In the past we couldn’t so easily see the behaviours of those around us as they disappeared as quickly as the person vacating. With the wonders of a technological age and social media being used so widely it allows us see things we may not have seen before (if we open our eyes to them). I’ll start with a story to explain my point…. Those who follow my blogs from A Step at…

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What you need to know when you are NOT ‘Ok’

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, confidence, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, self-esteem | No Comments

One thing that I see every week in my office in Sussex is wonderful, professional, intelligent women who are tired, overwhelmed, exhausted, fed up, dissatisfied or just plain at the end of their tether with being ‘strong’ In reality we have all done it haven’t we, been strong when we have no strength left? Almost as if it’s some badge we should wear with honour, ‘I’m on my knees but hey I’m still being ‘strong’ We watch wonderful women walking through the depths of hell and because they still get up everyday, put their war paint on and go out and fight the world we tell them ‘you’re so strong’  As if being strong is a good thing? As if being strong is what we ‘should’ do… Would you tell your daughter who was crumbling inside to ‘be strong’ – or would you wrap her in your arms, comfort her…

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Why we need to focus on every small achievement in our recovery

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, confidence, disordered eating, eating disorder, hypnotherapy | No Comments

Whether we are recovering from an eating disorder, a trauma or an addiction focussing on our achievements is imperative to success and long term recovery. Whilst the end goal may be on the mind of all those around the recoveree for the person who is involved in the process that goal may feel too much or too far away to create momentum. So, what can we focus on?

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3 things you need to know about disordered eating….

Posted by | BWRT, Eating Disorders, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

In my office in West Sussex I often work with clients who are struggling with disordered eating patterns. The difficulty with disordered eating is that in its vastness, and the many different types and symptoms it is an often mis-understood area. This can cause huge frustration for families and friends of the person who is experiencing the eating behaviours and can be a trigger to further issues for the person themselves. Eating disorders research has changed significantly over the years and there are now a range of categories and types of disorders which are acknowledged beyond the previously acknowledged anorexia and bulimia. Having recovered from my own disordered eating battle I have put together 3 things that you need to know about disordered eating to help you better support those that you love: (Please note – this is not for medical advice nor in replacement of appropriate medical support) #1…

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3 reasons why skipping meals is making you fat

Posted by | body-image, BWRT, diets, hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy gastric band, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

Every day in my Sussex office I meet with ladies who are at the end of their tether with their weight. Fed up of being overweight, feeling as though they are barely eating or only eating, they can’t stand their ‘lot’ any more and have decided that action is NOW So why is it that so many of them are ‘skipping’ meals but overweight? #1 – It’s causing internal stress  Skipping meals puts your thyroid and adrenal glands under extreme stress. This stress is fine if its a ‘one off’ BUT if skipping meals is a daily occurrence then it will have a long term affect on metabolism.Your adrenals and thyroid both help regulate metabolism and digestive function, so skipping meals increases cortisol in the body – which is an enemy to the adrenals and thyroid. Persistent skipping of meals thus creates metabolic issues and therefore affects weight – even…

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10 reasons your favourite diet is making you fail….

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, confidence, diets, hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy gastric band, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

Despite whether I was working in a gym or as a therapist in my Crawley office nearly 75% of people that I meet will offer me a statement along the lines of; “the only thing that ever worked for me was (insert weight loss diet)” Here’s my question…. IF it worked so well why are you not still at goal? Don’t reply just think about it……..whilst I give you 10 reasons why you were brainwashed into thinking it worked…. #1 – They teach you to hate yourself  No matter what organisation you choose, which diet plan it is, whether its online or in person they all teach you the fundamentals of hating yourself. As the leader stands in front of the group and allocates certificates to the biggest loss that week, anyone who lost less, or a pound or stayed the same is wondering ‘where they went wrong’ and their…

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The invisible eating disorder – do you have it?

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, diets, Eating Disorders, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

Eating Disorders….. a term which is slowly becoming more recognised but still so widely misunderstood. Did you know that according to a report commissioned by Beat “725,000 people in the UK are affected by an eating disorder”  In the latest version of the DSM (Diagnostic Statistic Manual of Mental Disorders) they cite the main eating disorders as anorexia, bulimia and binge eating disorder (BED), this eliminates EDNOS (eating disorder not otherwise specified).However before the latest change in criteria, it was estimated that of those with eating disorders, 10% were anorexic, 40% were bulimic and the rest fall into the EDNOS category which included BED. Here’s the thing though….an eating disorder is not linear… In fact, there are a whole host of Eating Disorders swimming among our friends, family members and colleagues that we may not even be aware of, because those experiencing them may look – just like YOU and…

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This New Year - Quit 'Trying'

Why we need to teach our children not to give up….

Posted by | Adventures of Brian, anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

When I used to teach my students often got fed up with me, I will add here that it wasn’t because I was a terrible teacher, but because I refused to listen to the words ‘can’t’ I can’t do it The words I wouldn’t abide by. I wasn’t being mean… The thing is, I said it because I knew that they COULD do it – I just needed to show them a different way. That was my job as far as I was concerned. If they weren’t getting it then I needed to explain it or demonstrate it in a different way so that they COULD get it and they COULD do their work and that they COULD achieve. After all, those achievements add up, and when we learn to persevere we learn do find new ways to do things. New routes to our goals, and new journeys to our…

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This New Year - Quit 'Trying'

When ‘just getting on with it’ breaks you….

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

“I just need to get on with it”  “I’ve got to get on”  “I’ve got to get back to it”  “I used to, I need to get on with it”  How many times have you used those words? Or watched and listened to a good friend or work colleague use them? If you’re anything like me its a lot! In a fast paced world where we have so much to do, our to do lists are never completed are you a victim of the ‘just getting on with it’ clique? So why is it a problem?  Here’s the problem….. The ‘just getting on with it’ clique are used to being invincible. They get ludicrous amounts of work done in a day, move mountains, are off saving the world. juggling a lot of balls and never seem to do them…. or do they? What happens when the ‘getting it done’ person…

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Why you shouldn’t have known…..

Posted by | anxiety, BWRT, hypnotherapy, narcissism, Responsive Therapy | No Comments

Narcissism is a term that is banded round with such frequency nowadays that it can be hard to work out who ‘isn’t’ being accused of the fate of the narcissistic personality. So what does it mean?  Whilst one school of thought will brand the narcissist as the person who is in love with themselves, posting endless selfies on social media and going out of their way to ensure that attention is focussed on them the true narcissist which entered the psychology books and magazines has a deeper secret. A narcissist is defined as being ‘a person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves.’ Narcissistic Personality Disorder, the process affecting the lives of innocent women and men every day is a pattern of abnormal behaviour which the narcissist not only has this excessive interest in themselves but combines it with a pattern of non-empathy in which they have…

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This New Year….. Quit ‘Trying’

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, diets, hypnotherapy, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

New Year – New You…. and all the resolutions begin… The problem with resolutions is that so few people ever achieve them, not for a lack of wanting to, and not because they don’t matter to them, it’s just that the very nature of resolutions is that we already know when we write them that it is unlikely we will commit to them for 12 months – but we will ‘try’. And there lies the problem… The very word ‘try‘ So what is the issue with the word? let me explain… The very nature of the word ‘TRY’ is that is it ‘ok to fail’. When we are very little our parents, teachers, aunts, uncles, family friends will all encourage us to ‘try’ and then, when they are tired of watching us struggle, or we cannot quite do it, they…..do it for us… From that moment on we learn that…

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Glance Back, Move Forward

Posted by | anxiety, body-image, BWRT, Children's Therapy, depression, diets, hypnotherapy, hypnotherapy gastric band, Responsive Therapy, weight loss | No Comments

There’s something about Christmas that almost forces us to reflect, perhaps because Christmas seems to come round faster and faster every year, perhaps because it’s one of the few static moments in our diary that we can be certain of happening and non-negotiable, you can hardly avoid the twinkling lights, wrapping paper and bustling shoppers, or the catalogue of Christmas adverts filling our television screens, can you? Christmas is therefore a pivotal point in which we can look back at what has changed over the last 365 days… Perhaps it is the…. The difficulties we have faced The changes in job, home, routine The changes in our children or loved ones The friends that we made, loved, or lost The changes in our health The happy moments, the sad moments, the memories Christmas for me is always a great time of reflection, often starting with the changes that were out…

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